GRE Essay Topic 948 - Milk and dairy products are rich in vitamin D and calcium, substances essential for building and maintaining bones. Many people therefore believe that a diet rich in dairy products can help prevent osteoporosis, a disease in which the bones weaken significantly with age and that is linked to both environmental and genetic factors. But a long-term study of a large number of people has found that those who have consistently consumed dairy products throughout the years of the study have a higher rate of bone fractures than any other participants in the study. Since bone fractures are a symptom of osteoporosis, this study result shows that a diet rich in dairy products may actually increase, rather than decrease, the risk of osteoporosis. Discuss how well reasoned you find this argument.
The assumption provided by the author that the diet rich in dairy product and milk decreases the risks of osteoporosis
The assumption provided by the author that the diet rich in dairy product and milk decreases the risks of osteoporosis are vague and unsubstantiated. The long term study did not mention about the type and number of people participated in the survey. Furthermore, the author provided a vague analogy between osteoporosis and Dairy products, due to which the author conclusion drawn by the author is flawed
To begin, the conclusion drawn by the author that a diet rich in dairy products can actually increase the risk of osteoporosis is flawed. The author mentioned about the Long term study on large number of people found that those who consistently consumed dairy products throughout the years of the study have a higher rate of bone fractures than any other participants in the study is vague and ambiguous. In this argument the author did not mentioned about the number of people targeted in the study rather than use a vague word many which is not substantiated to draw the conclusion.Furthermore, the author did not mentioned about the age group of the people who are participated in the survey and the also did not state the duration of the survey. For an instance, if the study is conducted on sportsmen or wrestlers which generally have broken bones in and out of their career. There is also a scenario that the study is conducted only on the old age people which generally have weak bones as compared to the youths.Based on the above mentioned analysis the author did not provide sufficient evidences in order to support the conclusion.
Secondly, the author implied that many people say that a diet rich in dairy product can prevent osteoporosis is a vague assumption. The author uses the word many but did not provide the number of the people who state the assumption. The author did not mention that the people who say that the dairy products can prevent osteoporosis are doctors.The diary product are rich in Vitamin D and calcium are essential to build and maintain bone, This little information can not have enough evidence to prove that the dairy product and milk can cure osteoporosis.
In Conclusion, To strengthened the above argument the author should have conducted a study to all types of people and provide a statistical analysis in order to support his conclusion. Furthermore, In order to strengthened his argument, the author should have provide a proper analogy to link osteoporosis to link with the milk and dairy products. since the argument presented by the author are vague and the evidences provided by the author are not enough to support the a strong conclusion provided by the author.
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